Thursday, April 7, 2011

Sketch Pages 316-317 and a note



This winter sure has been weird (another more jaded person would say that this winter has been "total balls" but I think spirituality has won out... well, you'll see).

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I don't know what it is with my family and the winter months. It seems like all of the worst things happen during winter. One winter my mother had tons of seizures. Another winter I was seriously ill. Another winter we were short on cash so we didnt have a Christmas and our utilities where shut off. My family attracts bad luck like Gerard Butler attracts all the ladies.

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However, my family has also been immensely lucky. Even with all the bad things that have happened to us, we are still here. Somehow the problems that almost kill us are rectified; some families don't get the help they need. We really are very lucky.

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This luck has never been more apparent than right now.

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Winter started out with the basic shitty formatting: Our hot water heater broke so now we have to boil water to take "showers" and wash dishes, unfortunately we only have one burner that works so 5 min showers now take 45m (and thats if you are going fast). Our sink broke so we cant wash more than 5 dishes at a time in the sink (we don't have a dishwasher) and we have to boil water for it each time. Our washing machine broke so to wash dishes we have to run the house outside to the washer and stand above it for 20min to make sure it doesn't overflow.

My brother had acid spilled on his leg at work, it became seriously infected and he cannot get money from his work. His doctor is telling him that he most likely will need skin grafts. We found out that the person who was supposed to keep track of bills let everything slide and now bills that were caught up on are now waaaay behind.

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now you may be thinking, "tl;dr, Camille"

if that paragraph was too intense here is a summary: Stupid shit happened in a 3 month span.

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But the biggest, could-have-been-the-worst thing was my mom getting sick. She had been sayinng for several weeks that she didn't feel right. That something was off. I had assumed it was stress because right now it is a bit stressful, what with the things I listed above and she is also moving across country.

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About four days ago she stayed in bed. For a couple days she couldn't move, couldn't eat, all she could do was sleep and sometimes she would wake up weakly crying in pain.

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The next day we finally called an ambulance for her. They came and rushed her to the hospital. Turned out she had several different illnesses at once and all of her organs were shutting down, the illnesses were too much for it to deal with.

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The hospital staff was shocked she was still alive. She was VERY close to death.

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And yet she didn't die. In fact, she is sitting in the room next to me. I'm staring at her with a creepy face.

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I'm not sure what I believe, spiritually speaking, but these situations make me believe that there is something. Something that watches my family and when we are on the precipice about to fall to ruin, the something pulls us back. I'm not sure what to call it: God? Karma? Blind luck? I'm just glad to have my mother back.

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